"Obamacare" is a term which means:
a) As God is my witness, I'll never pay for cough syrup again
b) The department of term-coining clearly didn't survive the sequester
c) He cares, you pay
d) They finally ran out of words to end with "gate"
True or False — Politics has no place in health care
a) True
b) Bwahahahahaha!
Starting Tuesday:
a) The Health Insurance Marketplace will make buying coverage easier and more affordable
b) I will be watching "The Voice" religiously
c) Whenever a TV pundit says "Health Care Marketplace," you have to drink
d) Adios, sunscreen—I'll have health care!
I think the biggest misconception about the Affordable Care Act is:
a) The rumored involvement of the Care Bears
b) The definition of "affordable"
c) How we got the North Koreans to pay for it
d) It all would have worked perfectly if it weren't for those meddling kids!
Under Obamacare, I will finally:
a) be able to get that arrow removed
b) be vindicated about that whole anti-Christ thing
c) learn the difficult but exquisitely pleasurable art of complaining about having a doctor
d) not be denied care for my pre-existing condition, political cynicism
Before Obamacare, my health care:
a) was not named after anyone
b) consisted of a Q-Tip, rubbing alcohol and prayer
c) was overseen by Doctor Robitussin
d) provided everything I could ask for except two things—health and care
I do not think government should be in the __________ business.
a) health care
b) all-up-in-my
c) support hosiery
d) governing
In health care, the concept of "prevention" is:
a) a scam by the left
b) just a sneaky way to promote that magazine
c) a tried and true method of avoiding more serious medical terminology
d) a way for doctors to charge you without actually curing anything
Since Obamacare was passed, it has faced a lot of opposition because:
a) the wealthy think that a healthy underclass is an uppity underclass
b) humans were involved
c) well, I'll just say it—true Americans are just born healthy
d) conservatives think it is a bad idea. Plus, they never get credit for coming up with the basic principles of it in 1989
If you have finished this misinformational quiz more angry than light-headed from laughter, it just illustrates how divisive politics can be. I mean health care. I mean politics. Maybe some day they will come up with a pill.
. . .
